Living Our Dreams

December Declaration

Buddha Bucks-©2007www.sherigaynor.com

Socially conscious spending month!

Now that Black Friday has thankfully passed us by, I have decided to dedicate December to helping clients and readers make some financially responsible guilt-free buying decisions during the holidays. Over the next few weeks, I will feature some cool sustainable gift giving ideas, that will allow you to feel good about the circle of giving.

I found a great article today as I reviewed my stats and saw a link in to someone Googling for gratitude and conscious buying. I am going to post a small excerpt here and if you are interested in reading the entire article you can link to Penny Nickel here.

Excerpt:

Think before you buy!  A wallet-sized reminder of your priorities

I stumbled across something on-line recently that I think is absolutely fantastic: a credit/debit card sleeve [PDF]  from the Center for the New American Dream that serves as a reminder to buy less and think about your values while shopping.

Just click on  the link, print it out, cut on the dotted line, and tape it up.  Then put your card(s) inside, and  you'll see the questions every time you pull out your credit/debit card  to charge something.  This is what's on the sleeve: READ MORE...

Contribute: Think globally...think sustainably...Where will you spend your holiday dollars this year?

A little gratitude for your Monday mornin' jump start

I found this on my walk yesterday. I just loved it, so I went home, got my camera and came back to capture the image. It was appropriate as Monday was looming and there is a lot on my plate this week.

People often ask how I manage to get so much done and stay so organized. It has taken a lot of practice, but I am pretty self-motivated and I think that is one of the most important traits to have when we own our own businesses. We don't have anyone standing over us cracking the whip-which is what we wanted-so it is up to us to know our rhythm and set the pace. Sure, the procrastination bug gets a hold of my pant leg every once in awhile, but not for long, as by now, I know the longer I procrastinate the harder I will be on myself and the worse I will feel. I wonder why we do that to ourselves?

I had such a nice response to this months newsletter and feature article on Gratitude, I am going to post it here. Feel free to let me know what you think by contributing below.

Contribute: How will you incorporate Gratitude into the up coming holiday season?

The Feature Article:

I woke up this morning to the most extraordinary dream. It fit quite nicely with my intention for the month-and for that matter the holiday season which is nipping at our heels-which is to focus on gratitude.

The other day I had to go into Target to get some office supplies. I watched in amazement as a frantic mother, cell phone ringing and Starbucks in hand, loaded up her already overflowing cart with enough toys, clothes and kids stuff to satisfy a small country.          

I wanted to gently reach out to her and say, if you had to pick 4 meaningful gifts out of that enormous pile in your cart, what would give your children the ability to really thrive in their lives? The answer? I believe our kids want more time with us.

In a culture where the term multi-tasking and working to support ourselves and our families has taken on new meaning, I believe our children are yearning more than ever for one on one time with us. Not as one more thing on the to-do list, but true cell phone and TV off quality time. Some of this quality time can be about educating your children about the concept of gratitude and creating new holiday family traditions based on your values-while leaving behind the pressure of consumerism.          

By identifying what we feel grateful for today, we release the false feeling of need. Here is what I do when I feel that feeling of need or want. I check in and ask myself what emotions lie beneath the surface. Is this an empty hole I am looking to fill, only to wind up feeling emptier when I realize it did not "fix it," or do I really need this to make my life better?

This way of celebrating gratitude actually started for me one day in Target shortly after we moved into our new home. We had all sorts of unexpected problems when we first moved in. Our realtor and seller had run for the hills and would not communicate with us about some of the issues. I was definitely frustrated, angry and mostly sad about the lack of integrity that I was experiencing from people I had trusted. And so in a misguided effort to cure what ailed me...I went shopping, hoping to pick up a few items we needed for the house and as I have learned, to unconsciously make myself feel better.

Shortly after entering the store, I went into my usual big store zombie state and started to put things into my cart that I thought would make our new home feel cozy. Just about the time I had some truly meaningless items in my cart, my cell phone rang. It was my husband checking in. He asked where I was and it was enough to break the trance-like state I was in. I looked into my cart and was truly horrified-which is why I related so deeply to the mother I mentioned when I began this article-there were about 3 things in the cart that I actually needed, the rest of it was pure fill the hole it's empty items. I thanked him for calling in the nick of time and one by one put the non-essentials back on the shelf. To be honest that day, I left empty handed, convinced that this was the only way to break this habit and you know what, it worked! To this day, I use the techniques I will describe below. Try it this holiday season and see if it works for you. Feel free to post your comments. I would love to hear from you.          

How to break the trance of consumerism and celebrate gratitude:

• Your first step is to re-examine your own personal values
• Identify the things you feel grateful for today
• Discuss the concept of gratitude at the dinner table and ask your family what it means to them
• When it comes time to shop, create a list
• Purchase ONLY the items on your list. If you see something else, jot in down in a notebook and think about it
• If you find yourself in the "empty-hole" trance, check in with your emotions, identify what are you feeling
• Ask yourself if you could live without this for the next 72 hours and put it back on the shelf. Chances are you will forget about it and not go back
• Create a family gratitude journal
• Have your children donate an art piece or one of their old toys to a family in need. Take them with you when you bring it, so they get a deep sense of how the other child will feel

How to have a mini-vacation in your own backyard!

Hey Feisty Females...Have you been good about managing your budget and not using your debit card as we discussed May 7, 2007 (see the article under our Hot Topics Category on this blog). Are you ready for a little time off, but your pocket-book still won't let you?  Well don't despair, here is how to have a mini-vacation for under $50.00

A few of us were ready for some kick-back-girl-friend time, so our writers group-Swirl-(Six women/writers involved in real life)-decided to have a pot luck girly-girl evening. Let me start by saying, I am not one of those who takes care of myself in this way, but at 47 and way to many years baking with coconut oil and reflectors in the Florida sun, it is time to start looking in this direction! So, one of our members asked fellow therapist/skin goddess, Annie McIntosh to guide us in using her line of luscious Eminence Handmade Organic Skin Care products out of Hungary. Annie has been using the line for about a year and she tells us friends have asked her if she has had "work done." She enjoys telling them that there were no knives involved, only fruits and vegetables. Annie invited us up to her beautiful home, with breathtaking views of our mountain ranges. You can see Carbondale's Mount Sopris jutting up in the middle of the window.

Here's Skin Goddess Annie...

The products are so organic she tells us you can actually eat them! Here is a photo of our group with the chocolate mask on. Putting the mask on was about as sensual an experience as you can get-alone-and the scent of cocoa remained on my hands the rest of the evening. Here we are with our masks on, there were a couple of tongues wagging in this shot!

I am extremely sensitive to perfume. Many commercial grade skin care lines have an overpowering perfume scent. Not this one! There were all sorts of scents, pomegranate, plum, stone crop, even a tomato basil! Each scent was light, intoxicating and  aromatic. I felt like I was walking through a garden when we opened each jar. The sound of women oooohing and aaahing could be heard around the table as we gently applied the creams and masks "in an upward motion."  Think When Harry Met Sally here...

Are you sitting down...I am ready to take out a home equity loan to purchase this skin care line! No, I am just kidding-sort of. I know, I have to walk my talk when it comes to the debit card  and budget idea, but my skin was actually glowing by the time we finished the evening!  It looked and felt like it did when I was a teenager.

To celebrate my new look and since we are a writer's group (in theory) the girls made me pose for the "jacket of my book,"  following a brief eye make-up lesson from SWIRL member Lisa Wilson-a true, girly-girl extraordinaries. It was really pretty funny, as this is not me at all, but it sure made us laugh hysterically, which was the point of the entire evening. Thank you so much Annie for a wonderful evening!

Sunday afforded me a long overdue visit to Aspen and the Music Tent for a $15.00 rehearsal morning. I went with Nancy, my mountain mama. Nancy was born and raised in Durango. Her dad Fred, was a miner and I love hearing the stories of her life. She is my elder, mentor and spiritual mom and I can only hope that I am just like her when I am in my 70's.

Nancy is the ultimate Feisty Female. For her 70th birthday, her kids-my Colorado siblings-bought her a parasailing flight off Shadow Mountain in Aspen where she has lived and raised them since the 60's. I was not there to witness the event, but I have no doubt it was something to behold. I can almost see her smile as she flew over her beloved town.

Nancy's favorite saying to me is, "Why not, of course you can!" She is the reason I applied for my scholarship to Italy in 1990 and lived there for 3 months. Thanks to my mountain mama, "Why not," is now the motto I live by. It is a great question to start asking yourself at least once a day.

Here she is with her Eurovan, her gift to herself when she retired from her years as a physical education teacher with the Aspen School District.

As we walked out of the tent we came across Barrett Rose, who was ankle deep in ditch diving. About 10 adults-many of them in their 60's-stood watching her with huge smiles on their faces. I was taken by the moment as she appeared to draw us together to remind us what it's like to engage in the simple things in life, like getting your feet wet in the ditch. Her parents told us she was quite the Feisty Female and apparently she had been in that water for quite some time and showed no signs of tiring of the experience.  For those of you with children, when you are feeling stressed, stop for a minute and go find them. They can help you remember how to find your way back to the present moment and remember what is was like to be a child.

The cost of my mini-vacation?

• Pot-luck girly-girl evening-$10.00 for food
• Day in Aspen-Music Tent $15.00, brunch $15.00
• Gas for the weekend-$5.00

How I feel today on a Monday? 

Priceless..

 Do This:

1. To find Annie and her delicious skin care line call her at The Alchemy of Skin, the number is 970-379-8855
2. *Create a mini-vacation for you a few girlfriends for under $50.00 in August.
3. Plan ahead, set the date and don't let anything come between you and that time!
4. Report back to the Feisty Females Living Our Dreams blog. We will even post photos from your mini-vacation to inspire other Feisty Females.  **Our writers group has our next date planned for leaf season... in mid-September.

 

Just say no to Debit Cards

I want to continue our conversation about financial consciousness with a discussion about debit cards. We are now doing a lot of our financial business on-line and through automated transactions. I will be the first to admit that the convenience is wonderful, but if we are not completely in touch with our financial picture and already dedicated to watching our spending, it can be as disastrous as credit card spending-without the huge percentage fees.

Why? Because plastic is easy and that is just the point isn't it. I do believe that advertising marketers know exactly what they are doing by encouraging us to rid ourselves of checkbooks and paper billings. They know that most of us are unconscious spenders and swiping that little card, shoving the receipt in your back pocket and running it through the washer, does not a conscious and savvy financial woman make. When you swipe it is kind of a rush, it feels like free money doesn't it? Well it isn't!

For many of the women I work with, besides getting them up to speed with Quickbooks (see blog entry dated May 4, 2007) This is the next horizon. Their challenge is to put away the debit card for one month and live with their old battered, boring checkbook. The learning here is that in a checkbook-if we actually balance them daily or at least weekly-we are confronted with a balance each time we write and enter a check. Now how is that for consciousness? Very often when we swipe, we have no idea where our balance is, or how much we have in the bank right at that moment. It can very easily lead to spending more than we make each month. Sound familiar to anyone?

I also suggest that clients pick a day of the week to attend to and tune in to their financial life. Mine is Friday, as symbolically, it signals the close of a week and opens the door for a prosperous new week.

There you have it ladies, just say no to debit. Should we discuss credit cards? Now don't get me started there!

Quick Tips:

• Find your old battered checkbook. Put it in your purse or backpack
• Put your debit card in your bank file for ONE MONTH
• Balance your checkbook at the end of each spending day
• Designate one day per week to dedicate to your financial life and well-being

Write it: How has my debit spending impacted my ability to be financially conscious?

Financial Consciousness

This weeks coaching theme was money. There are sometimes collective themes in my coaching work. That does not surprise me, as I tend to believe in the collective unconscious, that Carl Jung discussed. It is also just after tax season, and I am hearing about more of my clients getting hit this year with unexpected tax consequences. Money is one of "those"  subjects and there tend to be a lot of dancing gremlins associated with the topic. Sometimes these gremlins aren't even our own, but inherited gremlins.

So what does it mean to begin to form a conscious relationship to money? My first recommendation for my clients is buy QUICKBOOKS for Small Businesses or if you are not going to strap yourself, get Quickbooks Pro. You can start with Quickbooks for Small Business and always upgrade later as your business grows. The next step is to see if there is a class at your local community college where you can take a beginner start up class. If there is nothing in your area, then find a bookkeeper who can get you set up and give you a tutorial to help you get started.

I will tell you this, I don't know that Quickbooks is the best program for tracking inventory, and there may be better programs out there in that realm, but it will get you up to speed and conscious around your spending, simply and intuitively. Once all your categories are set up, it is as easy as entering expenses into a virtual checkbook. Another huge bonus is that it makes tax season a breeze.

Quite frankly, until I started using Quickbooks all those years ago, I was extremely phobic around math and money. I did it, but it was an exercise in frustration and chicken scratch. Now I can honestly tell you...I ENJOY watching my business grow and knowing exactly where the shifts are. This can even help you become aware of seasonal ebbs and flows-and as small business women-that will help us to feel grounded when we can say to ourselves, "Oh, my slow season is on the horizon, how can I prepare for this, so I am not panicking?"

More tips next week and our topic is Debit Cards....

Quick Tips:

• Purchase Quickbooks or some small business accounting software
• Take a class or hire a bookkeeper to help you get your accounts set up correctly
• Pick one day of each week to be your book work day. (Mine is Friday as it wraps up my week)
• On your chosen day, enter all invoices, receipts and checks written that week
• KNOW YOUR BALANCE

Write it: How can you become more conscious starting today around your finances?